My Big Boy

Tonight we bought Cash a lamp. Its a very special lamp. Not only was it on sale for $4.25, but it is the first piece of decor that we have purchased for his new "big boy" room. When we got home, for lack of a better place to put it at the moment, I sat it down on an end table. Throughout the night, I have peered over at it in emotional turmoil. Happy, because its a cute lamp that will match the bedspread I have picked out for his new "big boy bed" perfectly, and it was less than five dollars. Saddened, because it represents my baby growing up. He will be leaving behind his safari themed nursery. He'll leave behind the crib that has slept him so soundly (most nights). He'll leave behind the rocking chair that I was rocked in as a baby. All of these things will go to his brother. He moves on. I guess that's the name of the game. Mama warned me about this happening one day. Not long ago we talked about this very thing. She said, as you watch your kids age and welcome new phases of life, the phases become increasingly more difficult for the parents to reconcile. It wasn't that long ago that the task of moving Cash into his bedroom was so daunting to me. I had slept, literally nose to nose with that little baby from birth until he was nine months old. If it hadn't become so uncomfortable for him and I both, I think he would still be sleeping next to me to this day. I loved those nights of being able to cuddle, and nuzzle him to sleep. I hated, HATED the thought of him sleeping all the way across the house. Slumbering in his little room that I had spent months decorating. He would be in the dark. All alone. Eventually, after realizing that it was what was best for him, we made the transition. It turned out to be very easy for him. Easy FOR HIM. I still pray everynight that Cash will be safe sleeping in his room, "all the way across the house". Verbatim. It wasn't too long ago that we crossed that bridge. Now we are getting ready to move him once again. Its a bigger room, for a bigger boy. It won't be a nursery. There won't be a changing table. There will be a full size bed, and bookcases to store his big boy toys, leaving room in the toy chest for his brother's baby toys, which once belonged to him. It occurs to me more and more as Cash grows how much of a privilege raising children is. There are so many emotions that surface, some you never even knew you had, when you have a child. There have been many times over these last 14 1/2 months that I have thought to myself, "Wow, now I know what my mother meant," or "I wonder how my mother felt when she was going through that,". One of the great things about being a mother, is being able to see things through her eyes. The same thing goes for my mother-in-law. I couldn't have been more blessed when it comes to my mother, or mother-in-law. I would love for Cash and I to have the relationship that Colt and his mother have. Of course, I'd prefer it if Cash never marries, and lives in his big boy room, unchanged, forever. Kidding of course. Yeah...pretty sure I'm kidding. I'm sure glad Sharon didn't keep Colt all to herself, or I wouldn't have met my perfect match. I would have been matchless. I'm sure they'll come a day where I have to give Cash wings to fly out on his own. Today, I'm having a hard enough time giving him the guest room. All in good time I suppose. This wasn't intended to be a sappy post when I began. This blog is very therapeutic to me sometimes. Sometimes, its a chore, although a chore I'm happy for when I look back on my weekly posts from my pregnancy with Cash. Today, it was therapeutic. Wish me luck readers. I will post some pictures of the new room when its completed. As for a quick update on Cashman... New obsessions: Trying to gross me out by putting his feet in his mouth, as I say "SHOOOEY!" Biting everything. Throwing temper tantrums occasionally. STILL loves the dog bowls. He loves to dance, and shake his head "yes" and "no" when you ask him a question. Eating Habits: He has become a very picky eater. He eats oatmeal for breakfast every morning and refuses anything other than a peanut butter sandwich for lunch. Dinner can vary, but he'd prefer some sauteed zucchini and long grain wild rice. He won't eat meat unless I find some way to hide it in his other food. He is still drinking Almond Milk, which I recently found out has double the calcium per cup than a cup of cow's milk has! Sleeping Habits: Just in the last few weeks, I have been able to nurse him before bed, have Colt and I say a prayer with him, walk him in his bedroom, turn on his sound machine, lay him down, and he goes right to sleep. SUBLIME! Its the same for naptime except I don't do the nursing or prayers. He goes down at night between 9 and 11pm, usually averaging out at 10, and wakes up between 8:30 and 10:30am. Thanks for reading everyone! More pregnancy updates to follow!